fun fact i have a document with a list of all the mbti and enneagram and tritypes in order lol. anyway so i
literally can use my nice grapheme color synesthesia to quickly tell all the tritypes apart based on the colors.
btw this is my personality: infp sp/sx 4w5 495 melancholic-sanguine
also i thought i was 4w3 but every test says i am not, and i relate more to 4w5 traits like wanting to go be isolated
and withdrawn, also 5s apparently think about things for a very long time before doing them, which is more relatable
than 3s who are super ambitious and hard working all the time because they want to be the best. like, i also want to
be the best but i realized it is mostly because i want to impress guys, and that probably relates more to my sp/sx
instinctual variant rather than my enneagram wing. also, 3s tend to be self-promoting, but i do not tend to be self
-promoting, because i first must accomplish the things that will make me more interesting/better than everyone else
(like acquiring some good looks + learning some impressive skills). 4w3s just think they're already better than
everyone so they're really social and confident, whereas i mostly imagine myself being social and confident lol
in case that does not make sense, here is a bit of the description of 5s from enneagraminstitute.com:
"Besides Fives' relentless pursuit of knowledge are deep insecurities about their ability to function successfully in
the world. Fives feel that they do not have an ability to do things as well as others. But rather than engage directly
with activities that might bolster their confidence, Fives 'take a step back' into their minds where they feel more
capable. Their belief is that from the safety of their minds they will eventually figure out how to do things - and
one day rejoin the world.
...
Thus, much of their time gets spent 'collecting' and developing ideas and skills they believe will make them feel
confident and prepared. They want to retain everything that they have learned and 'carry it around in their heads.'
The problem is that while they are engrossed in this process, they are not interacting with others or even increasing
many other practical and social skills. They devote more and more time to collecting and attending to their
collections, less to anything related to their real needs."
yup that is pretty accurate!!! also, if i am a 4w3 it is probably a recent development, because i was definitely more
of a 4w5 when i was a kid. also in case it isn't obvious i realized i have a lot of the 5 traits because of all my
maladaptive daydreaming that is always going on lol. the majority of my hobbies when i was a kid were just different
forms of maladaptive daydreaming. examples:
- we had a swingset in our backyard and i would use it for hours while imagining i am a character interacting with my
various imaginary friends
- i would listen to music while imagining i am a character interacting with my various imaginary friends
- i would write stories about myself interacting with my various imaginary friends
- oh and then i used the internet to acquire non-imaginary online friends, but sometimes instead of talking to them i
would imagine myself talking to them lol
- and then when i went to high school i acquired non-imaginary and non-online friends, but i made them into characters
so i can imagine my character interacting with them (i also do talk to them sometimes)
- and literally every day i meticulously work on my schedule and plan out what i will do every hour of the day, and
then think about doing it instead of actually doing it loll
- and obviously i think about becoming extremely good at certain skills and impressing everyone someday, but i only
occasionally work on any of these skills
ok so obviously a lot of these are JUST because of the daydreaming thing and not because of the 5 wing, but the
withdrawn and isolated part is definitely related to it!! definitely more than 3 anyway. i am not an expert about
enneagram though so don't expect any of this to be very accurate! also, there is a LOT more to people than their
personality types and the entire system is not necessarily accurate in general. it's basically supposed to be "which
coping mechanism do you have and btw you can manifest it in a healthy way, you're not doomed because of your
personality type," so there's no "best" enneagram type or something, and you can't put people into boxes because of
it. i am mostly saying this because people are often like "why do you care about personality types, that is really
dumb and it's not even real" and like well it's just something i am very interested in, it's not supposed to be
scientific or 100% objective. and i hate when people compare it to astrology. like i obviously have more in common
with someone who answered the same way on a personality test than with someone who happened to be born in december???
even if it is an inaccurate personality test like 16personalities lol. anyway, that is my rant! i am in a ranting
mood and i am also getting really hungry. goodbye (i might edit this later)
i just watched howls moving castleeee and i was like, "i love howl i relate so much to him" and then i was like "i bet his enneagram is the exact same as mine" and YEP he is a 4w3 lol. and he is an enfp which is pretty similar to infp. this was a cause of joy for me because i literally love howl he is my favorite green slime AAAA i need to reread the book though because it is so good. that is all i have to say here bye
i found out that my enneagram instinctual variant is sp/sx which means i am self-preservation and also sexyyy
yesterday i stayed up very late analyzing the mbti of my characters and also everyone i know. my characters were very easy to type.
since all my other characters exist in real life, i only typed the specters.
[removed section - will reappear more in a more organized manner someday in the future]